He’s looks excellent in a suit. He can rock oversized glasses. He has been a dedicated and selfless manservant to Bruce Wayne. And he has masterminded the thievery of some serious Chinese gold from an Italian bank. But one thing it seems Michael Caine cannot do, is make a decent coffee…
An anonymous caller (thanks whoever you are) tipped us off about the opening titles to The Ipcress Files and said we should take a look. We did, and the bright star that is Mr Caine was suddenly dimmed somewhat. We guess he was distracted by some espionage or something – but here’s a list of how his coffee-making technique could be improved…
- He uses a blade grinder
These tend to produce inconsistently sized grounds, which result in a somewhat ropey flavour. He’d be better off using a burr grinder (which doesn’t use blades to chop the coffee up) or – better yet – order his coffee freshly-ground.
- He doesn’t measure out the coffee
Now it could be that M.C. has been through this routine so many times that his clumsy man-hands know exactly how much coffee is required for his morning brew. But we doubt it.
- Dangerous plug socket
This one isn’t coffee-related, just a general health and safely tip. That plug socket is pretty much hanging off the wall, which tends to be bad for one’s health.
- Water cooling
This is a thumbs up. The boiling water is left to cool for a while, before it’s added to the coffee. As Michael is obviously aware, adding freshly boiled water would scald the coffee.
- Immediate plunging
This is the most heinous of the crimes Caine commits in this short piece of footage. Instead of leaving the coffee to steep and for the flavour to emerge, it is immediately plunged and poured. As Gabi, our Head of Coffee points out, he doesn’t give the water enough time to pull the flavour and goodness out of the coffee. Poor, poor coffee.